The “Fifty Days to Freedom” journaling exercise is not necessarily meant to be completed in fifty days but to provide a helpful context for you to record your experience with pornography as it happens. It took me nearly three years to go through this process and while it doesn’t need to take you that long to understand yourself, there is no need to rush through. The objective is to understand yourself, not to change yourself – though both of these things tend to occur at the same time.
Along with an example entry, each day includes a prompt for your own writing and space for you to reflect or write a prayer. There is no need to follow the prompt, just use it as inspiration to record your thoughts as they reflect your own experience.
The approach you will see in the example entries demonstrates a Christian, male, and heterosexual perspective. It often deals with a struggle between the ideal I had of following God and the belief I had been taught that Christians do not use pornography. My actions contradicted my beliefs and I could not make up my mind to reject either one. I wanted Jesus and I wanted porn. I eventually came to the resolutions that closes this book, but the journey was sometimes difficult.
To support your own journey, refer to the sample entries and articles as needed for an idea of what to write – or simply to understand that others feel the same way that you do. Your entries do not need to look the same. The examples come from my own reflections as I developed this process and are only a starting point for you to explore your own experience. They are meant to provide a relateable example of an honest reflection. They are not meant to define the path that you will walk or even predict the conclusions you will come to.
It was often difficult for me to be honest with myself or to understand myself and you will recognise this struggle in some of the entries. The benefit of this book is to support a private and honest reflection. It is not an exercise where you pretend to be someone that you’re not. If you enjoy porn, write it down. If you think it is beautiful, or if you think it is disgusting, write it down. If you are proud of yourself or ashamed, write it down – and consider asking someone for help with celebration or encouragement. The objective here is to help you become honest with yourself and understand the root of your actions.
It is not helpful to say you don’t want to view porn if you are just going to do it anyway. Except in the case of serious addictions, the real problem with porn is that people pretend not to like it but still use it. If you like porn, accept that fact and ask yourself why. If you don’t like it but use it anyway, ask yourself why. You will find examples of both these situations in my example journal entries. The important thing to remember is that to change your actions, you must first change your mind. To change you mind, you must understand how you think and who you are.
Each of the 50 days will explore pornography from a different angle to help you be honest with yourself about what you think about porn. The first ten days should be completed in order, but after that, take a look at the categories and choose an entry that you think is relevant to what you are feeling or experiencing at the time.
In addition to this book, you can find additional inspiration and encouragement under each journal entry post online. Click below to view success stories, journal entries by others who are in the same process, links to further resources, and even a chance to contact the author with additional questions. You can also download additional copies of the “50 Days to Freedom” journaling entries for your friends, you study group, or your own personal use. The resource sections will also be available as a mini-book for easy sharing. Bulk discounts are available upon request.
I wish you all the best as you begin your journey. Please don’t hesitate to contact me if I can be of any help along the way.
– Charles M. Heyworth